Testimonials 2018-06-21T08:15:38+00:00

Testimonials

What others have to say about Crossings.

This past two weeks or so, I have been so very fortunate and honoured to experience the dying process and death through a new and surprisingly liberating perspective.

A perspective devoid of much of the fear, uncertainty, desperation and stress associated with the passing of loved ones. Spending my dearest friend’s last days with her and her beautiful family, and supporting and loving her and them as she progressed so gracefully through the natural, although confronting and heart-wrenching process of dying, has moved me to the core. The experience, as facilitated by Lola, has changed my long-held feelings of fear and dread around passing, to feelings of being able to express love and support and loss and grief throughout the final dance that is our dying and death.

Lola and her incredible intuition, calm, and peacefulness together with her professionalism, skills, and knowing, was instrumental in re-framing what death means to me. In Lola’s own words, she allowed me and guided me to ‘re-imagine’ dying and death. And I know I am not alone in the feeling of this profound sense of love, caring, and community that enveloped my friend and her loved ones in her last days, hours, and minutes on this earth.

My friend herself, her husband, her mother, her children, her family and her friends were all gently watched, guided, and supported in an environment where the sacredness of life, - and the equally complimentary sacredness of dying and death, - was talked about, laughed about, cried about, felt deeply and intensely and even joyfully at times, honoured, and actioned freely. Without fear of what was meant to happen. Or what was expected to play out. Or preoccupation with logistics and paperwork and planning over devoting our time to my friend and to one another. We were led by my friend, her wishes, her loved ones. Lola was our facilitator. Our advocate. She was, and still is, these 2 weeks past, our quiet constant at a time of such desperate fear and sadness. She was instrumental in helping re-frame the process of dying from one of mere deterioration and physical decline, to one of complete natural progression as has been the process for eternity.

In many ways, the experience offered by Lola as an end of life consultant and death doula echoes the very old practice of embracing our loved ones in the home upon their death, and sending them on to travel well, - what more intimate and personal time will there be in our lives, than the caring of our body at the time of death? Nothing seemed more appropriate or fitting than my friend’s dear children, mother, and husband preparing her body after death, and then the greater family and friends honouring her peaceful body at the at-home vigil that followed. I am no stranger to death, having lost both my mother and older brother in recent years, but having experienced the scaffolding, the comfort, the confidence and strength that Lola imbued into the passing of my beloved friend, - I must say that my concept of dying, death, and grieving have been irrevocably changed. To be able to devote ourselves so completely to my friend and her needs – whilst in hospital, and then once we were able to fulfill her deep need to be in her home, surrounded by loved ones to pass, - was perhaps the most precious gift that Lola’s presence gave to us. And Lola’s presence was constant although not intrusive. Helpful and instructive, although not prescriptive or lacking emotion.

Lola became carer, confidante, friend, and family. I can not thank her enough for her all encompassing love and attention to us all throughout what she taught us, is the very natural process of dying, - the closing of a life every bit as sacred a journey and in need of ritual and expression and emotion and personalisation, as the natural birth process of entering life.
- Shannon Quinn
Thanks so much to you Lola, for bringing me in touch with the sacred art of grieving and being with death . I am forever honouring how you have eased the way for me in this process. So much love and gratitude, Zoe ❤️🙏🏼🦋
- Zoe
Local GP On the home vigil and funeral of an Indigenous Elder:

Thank you Lola, It was a pleasure to meet everyone and I must say, I was so touched by the care and attention paid to W.H.; he appeared to me a Tribal Leader from past times and we miss out on this elegiac tradition now, which is a shame and a loss.
- H.H. (GP.)
Lola was AMAZING ! She helped us through the whole process and made it as easy as it could be. I highly recommend Lola and the ‘Crossings’ Service.
- Bridget Carmady
Good morning Lola, thanks for the workshop last night. I found the sharing very helpful and there followed one of the most restful sleeps I have had in some months.

I felt that I had been processing shared experiences during sleep, but awoke somewhat happier…
- Ken P.
Hi Lola - I'm so happy with what you did for me it was just how I wanted it and how dad would have wanted it. All my mates, who all knew dad, congratulated me and said it was an awesome funeral. Not sure if funerals are meant to be awesome? But it was a very special time, thank you. I would recommend you to anyone. How can I pay you?
- Jason Richbell
The farewell of a dear friend that I attended recently, which was guided by Lola, was a very beautiful ceremony. The practical aspects of the process which Lola organised, I felt, enabled my friend’s partner to have a level of control and nurturing, which would otherwise been impossible.

Lola was sensitive, gentle and a warm presence which provided comfort for me and probably for all who were present. The rituals she performed were moving and appropriate. I would definitely recommend her as someone who can provide what people need in the time of immediate bereavement.
- F.C.
Lola’s capacity for calm and clear efficiency throughout the demands of the intense emotional period between Bill’s death and the cremation were a lifeline to me. Bill died suddenly, and left no will or guidelines for how he wanted to be remembered. There were so many things to think of, and I had never been responsible for organising a funeral before. Without Lola’s commitment to giving us a unique and personal experience, our celebration of Bill’s life would have been so much poorer.

Having Bill in our home enabled us to have a sense of his spirit coming and going in the first few days – he died so peacefully in his sleep, and his colour was so good: I had to keep going into the room where his body lay to check he hadn’t woken up or moved! In life, Bill was a cheeky character, and I swear he smacked me on the bum on one of these visits!

It was beautiful to see him looking so peaceful and at rest. Even though I think he was at peace in himself before he died, there was much unresolved family business over which I agonised for years. I was very sad that I could not do anything to relieve some of his physical discomfort in the last years, especially his lack of mobility and confinement. Bill wanted to live in the bush, and hated living in an apartment.

So it was wonderful to be able to care for his body, to help Lola wash him, to lay him out, to learn the tribal ways, and honour his customs as best we could. Being able to have the smoking ceremony at our house, and to see him carried out while we sang for him – these were moments of profound meaning and for which I will always be grateful. I am especially pleased that Bill’s Aboriginal community were also grateful that we were able to follow these cultural practices.
- Anonymous
Ok so I’m quite new to the experience of having a loved one return to the family home after death. I mean, I have known about the concept for some time, but wasn’t sure how I’d actually feel and be in the circumstances. So I entered the family home - praying my butt off, for grace and loving connection. But a miraculous thing happened, having the deceased body present, felt so right and natural. My fears soon evaporated and a sense of peace of ease filled the room as we pre-pared for the families entrance and I felt a tremendous love surrounding us.

When the family was united with the deceased, the joy in the room was tangible. I will never forget that moment and Lola facilitated the entire proceeding with gentleness and respect. Thank you Lola and thank you Charles, with much love, Shelly.
- Shelly Bennett
I am deeply grateful to the service that Lola Rushartland offers through Picaluna. Lola guided me through the emotionally treacherous journey beginning with the sudden departure of my soulmate and husband.

Lola and Picaluna bring to you a straight forward process so you don’t have to think too much when you’re already challenged to your limits in the loss and shock of losing a loved one. The most valuable part of the journey with Lola and Picaluna is their high level of accommodation to your needs and special requests in relation to honouring your lost loved one. I don’t know where I’d be if I was not able to spend time with my husband’s body after he passed. Lola and I prepared his body at our family home with a ceremony. This time was sacred and special. I was able to capture a lasting memory of his vessel, the one that had carried him 56 years.

It really helped me to come to terms with the difficult realisation that he really was gone. Without this opportunity I would not be as far ahead in the acceptance of the loss and likely I’d still be in a lot of denial. Thank you Lola and Picaluna, deeply grateful you were there when I needed you.
- Allison
After my father died, I remember feeling overwhelmed trying to organise a funeral home, funeral and cremation, as well as contacting loved ones to notify them of my father’s death. It was a very stressful time. And I had feelings of regret for many years, wishing that it all had been handled differently but not knowing what that would look like. Years later I began to think about how we could make it more of a personal experience, when it was my mother’s time. In the weeks leading to my mother’s death a close friend told me about death doulas and about the support and service they provide. My mother and I discussed the options available and felt it was what we were looking for. So when the time came we contacted Lola on short notice as my mother’s death was unexpected at the time. She was very professional and dropped everything to be with us in our time of need. Lola promptly went to the hospital and organised my mother’s transport to our home. Afterwards, Lola came to our home with her table and cooling plate before my mother arrived. She helped me wash and dress my mother in a peaceful, respectful manner with gentle music playing in the background and aromatherapy oils filling the air. It was very healing for me and it felt like a natural extension of caring for my mother in death. I felt very honoured to be able to do this for her.

Lola’s caring and calm guidance was instrumental to the whole experience. We all felt very supported and didn’t have to think about making arrangements with funeral homes etc. There was no stress, as Lola organised everything while we could be free to grieve, be with our family and most importantly spend time with my mother. Other family members came to spend time with my mother speaking to her and playing her favourite music. They all thanked me for bringing her home and sharing this special experience with them.

We chose a beautiful wicker coffin from the brochure Lola showed us and it was perfect. We got to weave flowers through the wicker and it looked lovely. We loved our mother very much and we feel such peace knowing that we gave her such loving care whilst she was alive and in death. I highly recommend Lola to help you and your loved one throughout this process for both her professionalism and her warmth. She is truly passionate about her role as a doula and it is evident in all the little extra things that she did for us and my mother, that showed us that she really cared.
- Trish Gonzalez

Holistic and unique, end-of-life support and care for people and their families.​

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